


Failure At Its Finest

by mike_and_lessee



Category: BoJack Horseman
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Depression, Drug Use, F/M, Hook-Up, I'm Sorry, I'm trying, Implied/Referenced Abortion, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Multi, Original Character(s), Second Base, Sex, Sometimes OOC I'm so sorry, There might be sex??, There's gonna be sex eventually, This is BJH for crying out loud, boobie touch, for fucks sake, hardcore makeouts, just not now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2019-01-07 12:28:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12232842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mike_and_lessee/pseuds/mike_and_lessee





	1. Chapter One:: Ylva

\--Chapter One:: Ylva--

Ylva Bjornsen was walking through the previously named "Hollywood", her small, pale, porcelain hands cusping a warm cup of coffee, a cappuccino to be more exact.

She cozied closer into her parka and her blue eyes watched the snow through her blonde locks of hair. She enjoyed days like this, she liked the way the snow danced when it fell, she loved how white decorated the streets, and this parka was the cutest!

She then saw something that put an abrupt end to the gazing beauty of snow-fallen Hollywood.

"Mr. Peanutbutter, you can't just brush off your shoots because it's the holidays! I swear to god, it seems like I'm the only one who cares about this house's financial state.", "Katrina, it's almost Christmas. One of the most wonderful times of the year! Why not just enjoy it?".

Ylva adjusted her beanie to see a woman, in a luxurious fur coat, jeans, boots, knit hat, red lipstick, purple eyeshadow, and a clean, snow white pixie cut, arguing with her husband, a Labrador in a brown trench coat, blue jeans, snow boots, gloves, and earmuffs.

The Lab man turned and began walking backwards, beginning to muse to his disgruntled spouse about how this is a time of togetherness and family, "Y'know Katrina, maybe, this next month you should take off. You work so hard! Invite your mother to come down and have Christmas with us! I haven't seen the old battle axe in years!".

Before Ylva knew it, the tall, gold, dog bumped straight into her, knocking the coffee out her hands and all over her coat and face, causing her to let out a sharp squeal, "Ah!". She flicked her hands and shook her head, letting out a groan, "Oh...".

The Lab got up and dusted off his rear, turning and seeing that he just knocked his poor girl's drink out her hands and all over her, "Oh! I'm sorry!", he exclaimed, picking up her empty paper cup from the floor and using the sleeves of his coat to help dry her hot, soaked hands, "Are you alright, miss?" He asked, his ears perking in alarm.

Ylva nodded, "Yes.", she responded, taking the cup and sighing, shaking her head, once more, trying to hide her face.

The dog man looked to the coffee shop behind them and held his hand up to his wife, whom was now taking a call on her phone, "Excuse us.", he then placed his hand on Ylva's shoulder and lead her back inside, "We should get you cleaned up.". He sat Ylva down in a seat and went to retrieve some napkins.

He brought back some wet paper towels and some dry ones, allowing the girl to clean her hands and attempt to get the caffeinated stain off her cashmere coat, "I'm really sorry about outside. Guess I wasn't paying enough attention." He then let off a laugh in attempt to break some awkward tension, and held out his hand, "Mr. Peanutbutter.", he stated coolly, introducing himself.

Ylva took his hand, "Ylva, Ylva Bjornsen." She replied, taking his hand and giving a curt, firm shake, "It's honestly okay, Mr. Peanutbutter. Honest mistake.", she said, in attempt to make him feel better about the situation that they were currently in.

"I-I can buy you another coffee." Mr. Peanutbutter offered, his eyes flickering to the counters, where the employees were busily working, handing out coffees, making various drinks, plating pastries, and customers were coming and going, forming a bundled line.

"It was a cappuccino." She corrected, matter-of-factly, giving the Lab a pink smile, as she stretched back in her seat. 

His ears flicked up as he stood, "One cappuccino, coming right up.". 

Ylva looked out the fog tinted windows to see his wife, presumably named Katrina, climbing into a cab, as she argued on her phone. Ylva could tell that she was angry with whoever was on the other side, and boy, it looked like they were getting in one hell of a chew-out, though no words were audible. 

The observation was cut short as the table slammed into Ylva's relaxed stomach, "Uf!". "Watch it!", she snipped, shooting back up and glaring at a teen boy, wearing a red parka and purple beanie.

His hands went up in surrender, "Oh, uh, sorry!" He exclaimed, backing away and a girl with ginger hair grabbed his wrist and pulled him along, "C'mon Todd, they have some killer peppermint lattes here!". 

The boy gave an apologetic smile and shrugged before turning to go with his lady friend into the line. 

Ylva gave a small smile and shook her head softly, giving a tiny wave to the boy and then Mr. Peanutbutter returned, "One hot cappuccino for the lovely lady.". 

Ylva took the paper cup and placed it on the table, "Your wife left, by the way." She commented as Mr. Peanutbutter sat down in the seat across from her. 

Mr. Peanutbutter looked out the window, his ears drooping and a quick frown gracing his face, "She's been busy.", his facial expression turned happy, having no time to really analyze the sadness he felt, "You know, she's a go-getter!" He praised, snapping his fingers. 

Ylva took a sup from her cup and let out a giggle, "No. I wouldn't.".


	2. Chapter Two:: Fired

Chapter Two:: Fired

Ylva sat in the office of the ballet studio, her palms were clammy, her face was sweating, she probably had pit stains on her leotard. She was bunching up the calf of her pantyhose and caused the ribbon of her slippers to drag up with the linen that was beginning to snap and create drag holes in them.

 

Her boss came and sat down, the older woman just looked at Ylva, her eyes piercing through the thirty-five year old, European woman, "Out.", she said, snapping her fingers at the door, "Pack your bags and get out.".

Ylva waved her shaky, trembling hands in defence, "It wasn't my cocaine in my locker, I swear.". Yes, someone had slipped drugs into Ylva's locker and it wasn't her. "You could drug rest me, right now. I don't have even a hint of drugs in my system.". That was a lie, she had taken some acetomedophine that morning, as she was combating a common cold, but she had nothing illegal in her system persay.

"I'm not taking any chances.", "I want you out of here Miss Bjornsen.", "Now.".

Ylva hung her head and obediently nodded, standing up and turning on her heel, going downstairs.

She had no idea who hated her so badly, she tried to get along with everyone, what was that person's problem? Sure, Ylva could be very "Type-A", been nasty, but she didn't understand why anyone would ruin her career. That was the one thing someone should never mess with.

She went to her locker and picked up her duffel bag, she didn't even bother changing. She just wanted to get out of that studio before anyone saw her and began to ask questions or picked fun at her. She was on the brink of tears and she just wanted to get in her car and leave San Diego. This was a shit town and she was beginning to wonder why she didn't stay in Hollywood, where she could have became an actress or something wonderful. 

 

She had friends down there and a promising future, especially after befriending Mr. Peanutbutter, a sitcom star of the ninties. He had offered her a part on the show, even though it was a supporting role and she would only appear about twice per season. But, she had to be stubborn and turn it down, she wanted to be a famous dancer.

That was now down the drain.

Where would she go now? She scurried to her car and sat in it.

Wait... Mr. Peanutbutter! She still had his number, right? Oh, this was just wonderful! Fantastic! She picked up her phone and dialed the dog of her past up, the ringer played the theme to his old show before a familiar voice answered, "Hello?".

"Hello, is this Mr. Peanutbutter?".

"Ylva? Is that you?" She heard from the other side of the line, "Where have you been stranger?".

Same old enthusiastic Mr. Peanutbutter, and that caused Ylva to smile, though the tears were dribbling down her cheeks. She sniffled, "San Diego." She answered.

"Ah, following the good European Immigrant dream?" He asked to which she giggled and replied wirh, "Mhm.".

"How are things down in Hollywood?" She asked, her hands gripping the wheel as she popped her back and took a deep breath in.

"You mean to say 'Hollywoo'?" He questioned.

Ylva was silent, what the heck, Hollywoo? It's Hollywood, wasn't it? There is no way Hollywood would change its name to something as silly as 'Hollywoo'. Well, it was twenty sixteen, anything was possible. "Hollywoo?" She finally inquired, hoping her confusion was noticable.

"Yeah, you didn't hear the news? Hollywood is now Hollywoo. It's a long story.", "...Maybe you should come down here! I could tell you all about it! You could meet Diane, and Bojack, and Princess Carolyn, and Todd... it would be great!" He sputtered, in a overwhelming excitement.

Ylva looked at the dance studio then her lips turned upwards, "Maybe, I might.".


	3. Chapter Three:: Good Morning, Hollywoo!

Chapter Three:: Good Morning, Hollywoo!

Exhausted, Ylva woke up in the back of her car, she had a duffel bag of sweaters, jeans, hair products, and other things stuffed away in her trunk. She sat up and stretched, seeing that the Holly...woo sign was in clear view.

She rubbed her eyes and put the key in her ignition, man, she needed some coffee... like right now. She turned the key and the car's engine began rumbling and jolted Ylva awake. She placed her foot on the gas and pulled out of the ledge over viewing the town. 

She was excited to see an old friend, she knew that Mr. Peanutbutter had remarried, she didn't know how many times, she was oblivious to the fact he had married Jessica Biel, or that his wife was ghostwriter, Diane Nguyen. But she was happy that he wasn't with Katrina anymore. That woman was a bitch. 

She wondered who Diane, Princess Carolyn, and Todd were. She knew who BoJack Horseman was, she enjoyed the show of "Horsin' Around", she thought the light-hearted nature of the show was quaint... and the multiple headlines Mister Horseman was involved with always gave her a laugh. Like when he sneezed all over one of the patrons at a Christmas party, or when his sexual partner count was up to... forty women. Like, jeez, wouldn't that cause herpes, syphilis, gonnerhea? 

She went and pulled into the first coffee drive through she came across, she didn't care if it was shitty coffee, she just needed caffeine and now. She ordered the usual, a cappuccino. And she parked in the parking lot.

She took out her phone and texted Mr. Peanutbutter,

"Mr. Peanutbutter: Sent 8:34 AM: Hey PB, It's Ylva, where should we meet up at since I'm in Hollywoo?".

She sipped from the cup and let out a low mumble of pleasure as she shut her eyes. She then heard a tiny ding and peeped at her phone, 

"Mr. Peanutbutter: Received 8:36 AM: Hey Ylva!! Maybe you could swing by my place?? Diane made burritos! :)".

He then messaged his address to her and another smiley face. Bright eyed and bushy tailed.

Ylva pulled out of the parking lot and zoomed over to the Peanutbutter residence, which had a nice fountain and looked very... Cali-Dog Chic. She was afraid to go in, the knots were in her stomach, and the thumb tacks were on her toes. 

She got out from her car and rolled up the sleeves on her champagne colored turtleneck sweater and stood, she slowly walked up to the door, her knees were weak, her arms were heavy, she lifted her right arm and pressed the doorbell in.

A young Asian woman answered the door and golden dog ears popped up from behind her and then Mr. Peanutbutter popped out from behind her, "Ylva!".

"H-Hello." She responded before being enraptured into a warm, welcoming hug. She wrapped her arms around him before he pulled back.

"Diane, this is an old friend of mine, Ylva Bjornsen. Ylva, this is my wonderful wife, Diane Nguyen." He introduced the two women to eachother.

Diane took her hand and shook it, "Nice to meet you, Ylva. Mr. Peanutbutter was so excited for you to be here. Come in, I made you a breakfast burrito!" Diane offered and lead her inside and Mr. Peanutbutter shut the door behind them.

Ylva sat at the dining table at the left of Mr. Peanutbutter and across from Diane and the morning chatter began as they all began to eat the bacon and egg burritos Diane had prepared.

"So Diane just finished writing a book!" Mr. Peanutbutter exclaimed causing a little bounce in response from Diane.

Ylva raised an eyebrow in inquiry, "Oh, what about?" She asked before taking a bite of the tortilla that held savory bacon and scrambled eggs.

Diane lifted a strand of loose hair and put it behind her ear before stating, "Well, I wrote a biography about BoJack Horseman. I had to spend months gathering information and getting to know BoJack, I'm just happy that it's finally over. I'm pretty pleased with the outcome, so far. It's been receiving a lot of good recognition." Diane explained, giving a smile before eating a bite of her burrito, "What brings you to Hollywoo?".

Ylva felt a blush begin to rise from her face and she wanted to hide the fact she was trying to hide from the fact she got fired and she was now jobless, "Uh... culture, career opportunities, visiting an old friend." She managed to stutter out.

"Career opportunities? Don't you already have a job in San Diego?" Mr. Peanutbutter asked, his face beginning to frown as he squinted and bunched his eyebrows in confusion.

Ylva realized, yeah she "did", emphasis on did, but he can't know that now, "Well, yeah. But, Hollywoo has so much to offer, I was thinking of quitting. Moving here.", "I'll be closer to people I know and I can reach out to more of my friends and family.", "My mom lives on the far parts of Hollywoo.".

Mr. Peanutbutter flicked his ears up in responce, "That's right!".

Diane then asked, "What do you do for work?".

Ylva responded, "I'm a preformer, ballet. I've always wanted to be a dancer, ever since I was a little girl.", "But now I can land major roles here, everyone must start somewhere.".

Mr. Peanutbutter smiled, "Glad to see you changed your mind!".

"Yeah. I did.".


	4. Chapter Four:: Is This How He Always Is?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, sorry, this is a big ol' chapter! And this may seem out of character for Todd, but this episode takes place during pre-AroAce! Todd ((More Specifically, the episode 'Still Broken', centered around Herb Kazazz's funeral)) , and if you see that episode, he does some out of character things though out! Hopefully you understand!!
> 
> \--Ciao, Lessee ♡

Chapter Four:: Is This He Always Is?

Ylva was laying in her hotel room, she had spend the previous day in Hollywoo, she visited her mom and aired her dirty laundry about getting fired and other dramas that happened back in San Diego, involving failed relationships, diets, getting blackout drunk a few times, how shitty work actually was, etcetera.

Her phone buzzed and she answered, "Hello, Bjornsen residence, Ylva speaking.", she asked, stretching and rubbing her eyes.

"Hey, did you know that the creator of 'Horsin' Around', Herb Kazazz? Yeah, he, uh, he died. I was planning on going to the funeral, we could rub elbows and help you with your business opportunities?".

"Mr. Peanutbutter?" Ylva questioned as she looked at her closed curtains. She got up and opened them, blinking her eyes at the sun shining through, she let off a soft scoff.

"Yeah, do you wanna go?".

Ylva bunched her brows, "I guess... but, I kind of want to go sight seeing today, sometime soon. I might bounce early." She explained, she wanted to see how much Hollywood had evolved, she wanted to see the new and improved Hollywoo.

And funeral just weren't the right place to rub elbows. At least, Ylva thought that way. She didn't feel right going either, due to only knowing Kazazz for 'Horsin' Around', she wasn't close to him, she wasn't related or friends, just an admirer. 

She went to her duffel bag, she had showered the previous night, so all she had to do was do her hair and change. She got out her outfit, a key hole wool shirt that connects around the neck, a white pencil skirt, and white pumps. She threw her hair up into a messy bun and fanned on lip gloss and bronze eyeshadow.

She got into her car, caught up with Mr. Peanutbutter and Diane stayed home to work on other projects.

They went to the service and she formally met BoJack Horseman, Sarah-Lynn, Joelle, and Bradley, and they went to where the after party was held at.

She grabbed a plate of snacks, like crackers, cheeses, grapes, and a glass of some red wine. 

Then a pink Persian approached her, centering her face, "Wow. Look at you!" She exclaimed and Ylva was confused as she popped a slice of sausage into her mouth.

"You have got a face!", "Princess Carolyn, Talent Agent for Vigor, nice to meet you!", the older cat woman stated, holding her hand out.

"Ylva. Ylva Bjornsen." Ylva replied, taking her hand. Well, this is Hollywoo, morale is down and shmooze is up.

"Well Miss Ylva, have you ever thought in starring in a movie? Because you are gorgeous and would do well in this new movie coming up called, 'Christmas In July'! I would like to add you to my list and take you under the wing, kid.".

Mr. Peanutbutter came up from behind and pat Princess Carolyn on her back, "Ah, Ylva, I see you've met Princess Carolyn, she is probably one of the best agents around! She actually got BoJack into the new film of 'Secretariat'! Heck, she goes for what she wants.".

"And I want you. If you'll have me?", Princess Carolyn asked, taking out a business card and handing it to Ylva.

Ylva took her card and flashed a quick smile, "I'll keep you in mind.", "Hey, I think I want to get out of here. Can you drive me back to your house, Mr. Peanutbutter?" She requested, frowning once again. 

Mr. Peanutbutter's ears popped up, "Hey, have you met Todd yet?", "He could take you around Hollywoo and show you some of the best places!".

Ylva thought about it for a moment, "I guess having a tour guide won't be too bad." She said right before Mr. Peanutbutter lead her to a younger guy, he wore a beanie that was an orangeish-yellow which had some of his curly bluish-black hair, red jacket, jeans, and flip flops, he had a good amount of stubble as well. 

"Todd, this is my friend Ylva. Ylva, this is Todd. She hasn't been to Hollywoo in," Mr. Peanutbutter let off a soft "psh" and rolled his wrist before fisishing, "Years.".

Ylva instantly felt old.

Todd smiled and wrapped his arm around the waist of the slightly taller girl and her hips bumped his mid abdomen, "There is soo much to see in Hollywoo! How about we start off in..." he paused and used his hand to paint the sky, "BoJack Horseman's trunk!".

Ylva was a little confused, "Bo...Jack's trunk?" She asked, what was so good about that? It probably looked like any other trunk of a car, sure BoJack was famous and rich, but his car was still a regular car.

Todd took her outside and popped the trunk, climbing in and pulling Ylva in after him. Todd shut the trunk and placed an empty glass bowl on his head before exclaiming, "I didn't know he had food back here!", as he held up a melted fun sized chocolate bar. "Want some?" He offered, holding out a peppermint.

Ylva shrugged and pulled the tabs away from eachother, pulling the mint out and popping it into her mouth.

The car swerved and the two bounced around in the trunk, both falling into a tangled mess, and Todd exclaimed, "Houston, we have a problem!".

Ylva squirmed under him, "Ow! Why are we moving?" She snapped, trying to push the younger man from off top of her, he was probably getting that chocolate bar all over her top! "Tell me!".

Todd then attempted to explain, "BoJack might be leaving the funeral-",

"He might be what?! I have a car I have to get back to!" She did not want to leave her car unattended in Hollywoo, who knows if Diane is at the house protecting it or not?

"Hey, I'll get you back after we go sight seeing, like you wanted. Okay?" Todd proposed, trying to calm the woman down, he didn't have a lot of room to maneuver in the trunk, especially with another person accompaning him back there.

"If this is your idea of 'sight seeing', I don't think I want to continue with you. I want out of here!" She said, springing up and out before hearing, "Ylva-!".

The car was stopped and Ylva climbed out the back, "Goodbye Todd!" She snipped, venom lacing her two words as she turned on her heel and began to head out of the studios that Kazazz's office was in. She flipped a strand of hair from out her face before hearing, "Ylva, wait.".

She peered over her shoulder, raising one eyebrow, she remained silent, she stomped one heel to the ground.

"I promise it will get better, give me a little more time. We'll go sightseeing.".

Ylva turned and folded her arms, "If you promise me, we'll actually go see something, then I'll go with you.". 

Todd nodded and smiled, his eyes glossing over, "Yeah... we will.", "But, first, let me check in with BoJack. I'll be right back.".

Todd turned and ran into the business building.

Ylva took out her phone and popped in a stick of peppermint gum as she began sending out tweets and texts to her mom and friends ((friends being Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter)). She sat back in the trunk and relaxed, waiting for Todd to come back.

Time had passed, twenty minutes more specifically, and Ylva was growing impatient, she could only view trending memes for a little bit before they become old. She got up from the trunk and slammed it shut, adjusting her purse. She should have known that he would flake, what a chicken-shit.

She was walking away before a hand gripped her waist, "Where are you headed, babe?" A more low and gruff voice asked her.

Ylva pushed whoever it was off and looked up from her phone seeing it was Todd. "Where have YOU been, jerk?".

Todd took her by the hand and said, "Places. But where are you goin'? We still got things to do." He stated smoothly, in a way that made butterflies flutter in the older woman's tummy.

"Whatever you say, Todd." She mumbled, allowing him to put his hand back on her waist and lead her out of there.

"Who you callin' 'Todd'? Name's Toad, dollface.", "Toad Chavey.".

Ylva raised an eyebrow but she still smiled as he said that, it was... sexy, to say the least. Charming. Masculine. This is what she knew she needed, a charming, debonair, manly man by her side. She placed her hand around his shoulder and he swung a plastic ring that carried cans of 'Squirt' soda in his opposite hand and popped one off, using the tab to let out some air and handed it to Ylva.

She gladly accepted the drink as they made their way out, "So, where to first, Mister Chavey?" She asked, her throat rumbling out a purr and she emphasized 'Chavey'.

Todd lead her from Parrotmount Studios and out onto the side walk, "I was thinking we go to a club or maybe... a motel?".

Ylva's heart began fluttering and pounding as she felt like a giddy teenage girl, who's most sensitive parts were tingling, "Oh, a motel, you say?" She asked, stroking his fuzzy chin and raising an eyebrow in anticipation.

"If that's where you want to go, babe, then we can rent a room for a night.".

Ylva felt like jello and she wobbled down to lean on him before her knees buckled and she toppled over. "Whatever you say." She mumbled fanticifully.


	5. Chapter Five:: Ca-Ching, Ding Ding, Home Run In Hollywoo!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'know, long chapters are a pain in the ass to read so I'll do y'all a favor and chop 'Still Broken' into a few chapters, since this is a pin point in the book, especially in Ylva's love life, I knew it was going to be long. This MAY or may NOT have sexual intercourse in this chapter, fair warning to all you guys out there, also, this is still OOC for Todd ((but he's in character for 'Still Broken')). Hope you enjoy!!
> 
> \--Ciao, Lessee ♡♡♡

Chapter Five:: Ca-Ching, Ding Ding, Home Run in Hollywoo!

Ylva's and Todd were touring the finer things of Hollywoo, 'finer things' being clubs, bars, and other nightlife activity. 

They just exited a club and Ylva shielded her eyes from the blaring sun, "Forgot it was daytime." She muttered, her shirt had multiple stains littering the white fabric and she was barefoot.

Her feet were killing her, the shoes she chose to wear were chafing her ankles, causing blisters and first degree burns to begin forming. She would kill to be in some slippers or flip-flops right now! Her feet stung against the pavement and she pushed through a crowd of women in strappy tops, skimpy dresses, and impossibly high heels. She turned to see Todd, in sunglasses, they looked a lot like Mr. Peanutbutter's aviators but hey, there were multiple pairs of sunglasses out in the world.

He gripped her hip once again and said, "How about we go to dinner and then head back to that motel we were talking about earlier?" He suggested, giving her a smirk that she hadn't been able to resist that entire day. 

She cupped his chin and lead his eyes to hers, "Sounds wonderful, where do you suggest?". She didn't care as long as there was booze there. Ylva was beginning to crave the aphrodisiacs like chocolate and fine wine, not that cheap stuff they poured at Herb Kazazz's funeral. You'd think at a successful TV show creator's funeral, they would serve something nice but all that was there was cheap wine where the alcohol overpowered the taste, meat platters, and sub sandwiches. She wanted something to get her in the mood.

She was in her mid-thirties, she couldn't really get all gooey and sexy like she could in her teens and twenties. Those days were over as she was approaching menopause.

She didn't understand how such a suave younger man was showing any interest in her. Sure, she wasn't an old woman, walking around with a tank of oxygen and she sure as hell didn't have those gross, hard caramels in her purse.

Her mom always had those in the candy dish on her coffee table, both her mother and her mother's new lover liked them but Ylva found them to be disgusting. If you want caramel, take it in a softer form, not one that will shatter your teeth upon contact.

She was going to enjoy every minute she spent with Todd, he was paying attention to her and she hadn't got attention like this in two years, and he's a bad boy on top of that! What woman wouldn't suck in all of the pampering from a devil like him?

Todd tilted the sunglasses down and said, "I know one of the best places in town. It's called Elefanté. BoJ actually owns the place, I'm sure he wouldn't mind if we just ate there." There was then a pause before Todd let out a low, devious chuckle, "For free.".

Ylva let out a soft, "Oo.". That was a tad alarming, she was going to pay anyway because she knows if BoJack found out about them dining and dashing, he could find them, cut their asses off, and mount them on a wall, showing them off like trophies, which BoJack hasn't won in... "psh, years." as Mr. Peanutbutter would say.

They took a cab to the restaurant, were seated, "Order whatever you want, it's free here." Todd claimed, giving her a sly wink.

Yeah, hopefully he aims low, it was free because SHE was paying for it. And besides, she didn't exactly think that Todd had much money anyway, especially since the motel they rented was one of the cheaper ones, that had a rickety bed with a old TV and alcohol stains on the carpet that if you were to slide across it, you would tear all your skin down to the bone.

She was running out of money, she couldn't find work for the past few weeks, in San Diego. But, hopefully all will end well with Princess Carolyn, she'll land the part in this movie and make a few bucks, at least enough to try and pay for rent in some place. She was too proud to ask her mother, or Mr. Peanutbutter for a place to stay. She couldn't do that. And she wasn't on a good enough level of friendship with Todd or BoJack to even insinuate asking, "Hey, can I crash on your couch?".

A waiter came by with some wine, and took their food orders, Ylva did the math and she now only had about one hundred dollars left... would she be able to pay for her own hotel room after this night? She might just have to stick to cheap hotels or maybe she could... no, she still isn't going to ask anyone for their help. That was unneeded and she could set up a meeting with Princess Carolyn tonight and set it for tomorrow. After she slips out of that motel.

"Hey, baby, what's goin' on with you? You look like you just saw some sorta ghost?".

Ylva shook her head and looked into the vase in front of her, her pupils were dilated and she began to sweat visibly over her snow white skin, "Just thinking is all.".

"That's dangerous." Todd snickered as he leaned back in the chair, "Maybe you shouldn't do that?".

Ylva bunched her eyebrows in concern and pursed her lips before muttering, "Hm.". Well, someone had to be the one with their head on their shoulders if he wasn't going to be. And she was the only other one in their group. So, by default, it had to be her.

The waiter came back with the food and Ylva stared at her plate. It was a small portion, probably because she ordered spaghetti and meatballs... off the kid's menu. Hey, think cheap was the way to go here.

She ate it all in about five bites and of course, that raised some questions.

"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...this is technically Chapter Four//Part Two...
> 
> \--Ciao, Lessee ♡♡♡


End file.
